Fortune Cookies and Beignets

How many fortune cookies are too much?  I'm mean, what’s the magic number we are allowed to eat in one sitting? It's part of my attempt to live life on the edge in 2015!   

I think I started it out right with a trip to New Orleans and Brittany's 21st birthday.  Yikes!  Where are those fortune cookies!

Earlier in the Fall, I talked Brad into a trip with the girls.   It's part of my personal goal which is to continue to do fun things as a family;  Not become that family that stares at each other 4-5 hours at Christmas and Easter.   After some pondering and visiting the piggy bank, we decided to go to the Big Easy.   Our goals were simple:  Warm weather, beignets, give Stephi a chance to hear some French Creole, and celebrate Brittany’s 21^st birthday.  

Flights and hotel were soon booked, so all we had to do was wait.

First came Thanksgiving, my most dreaded holiday since Joshua’s death in 2010.  Luckily,  the 3^rd Annual Joshua Newman 5K followed quickly.  This year we raised $9,000 for EMFIT Seizure monitors for those families unable to afford them.  The event is always so wonderful, and so bittersweet…I love the support, the kids, the families.   My heart still wishes I was home just chillin’ with Josh.   

We waited through December when the girls returned for Winter/Christmas Break.  Soon the house was brimming with tweeting, cell phone rings, and laughing  teens/twentysomethings ploppin’ down on the couch to watch Christmas movies.  We sang the familiar hymns by candlelight, zipped through Christmas, and brought the tree down a couple of days later as part of kitty proofing the house for our trip preparation.    

My birthday came along the way, so a group of soccer moms piled into a couple of vans and  hit the local karaoke bar where we sang loud and proud albeit slightly out of tune.  At the end of the evening I sang “Midnight Train to Georgia”  the unofficial love song between Brad and me, with my very own Pips, backing me up. 
 

New Year’s Eve came and went, then it was time to throw our suitcases in the taxi and head to the airport.   I gotta admit, when I was waiting for the trip to come, I never imagined this kind of wait after we boarded the plane.
Vacation begins. Jet Engine 1 not working; Back to gate. Engine fixed in 1 hour;
Pilot announces end of their shift; must bring on new crew -1 hour.
Crew not replaced, let us know they'll do their best to get us there safely even though they've been working since 8 am.....
Passenger freaks out. Doesn't want to die at the hands of tired pilots. Wait for someone to escort her to gate and must remove her luggage-1 hour. 3 hour delay in all. Come through lightening and high winds.
 I think the flight attendant said it best......
We're sorry for the long delays but really just glad we got here.

It was so worth the wait!

Just trying to teach my girl some real life skills.  Drink responsibly!

Love = Beignets!

Photo bombing Stephi's selfie at Jackson Square!

Birthday Balloons on Bourbon Street. Say it 5x fast!

Then just like that, everything we were waiting for was over. 

The girls left and it became waaayyyyy too quiet!  To stay busy and get into the spirit of the new year, I thought I would organize my whole house, work out 3 hours, diet and save money for 2015.  Instead I stayed in my pjs, binge watched Gilmore Girls, and ordered Chinese take out which brought me the fortune cookies I'm binging on, and some great insight to follow in the new year. 

I'm open to suggestions.....

• Hearty laughter is a good way to jog internally without having to go outdoors.
• Two days from now, tomorrow will be yesterday
• A new voyage will fill your life with untold memories. 

Here's to new adventures in 2015.

Hugs!

Sherri

Not Me!

When I was growing up, my brother and I would do all kinds of stupid kid things;  Soon after, mom would come in and ask, "Who did it?"  (Who left the toys out, forgot to close the front door letting all the animals run amok?)   We would both yell out “NOT ME!”   She would roll her eyes, and send us off to corral the wild animals ....an old barking Miniature Schnauzer, who loved to be scratched behind the ears, and two cats so vicious they were known to cuddle up to you and fall asleep.

When I had my own children, the accusations continued, but from a new source...the man who claimed he loved me!  “Who forgot to close the door?”  Not Me!, it must have been one of the kids.  “Who left their bowl in the sink?” Not Me! It must have been one of the kids.  Who left the oven turned on?  Not Me!  It must have been our 3 year old.  Ooops! Grrr, trick question....Ya caught me!

Who forgot to close the dryer so the baby couldn't play in it?  NOT ME!

Last year when he yelled, “Who forgot to turn off the hallway light?  You’re wastin’ resources!”   I responded, Not Me!  Must have been Stephi!



I just LOVE shoes!   I can hide toys in them,  or steal them.

The last several days Brad has been out of town, so it’s just been me, Stealth Kitty and Yankee.  It has been a bit of an awakening.  I came home from work, and found the closet door open, and the light on, leaving full shoes access to an ornery cat.  Can Stealth Kitty reach the light switch?  Nope.  Does he know how to open door knobs?  Still No!

The next morning, I went downstairs to my usual morning spot and found a cereal bowl with dried cereal crumbs laced around it.  I looked around….no kids, no Brad, Yankee doesn’t eat cereal. Who do I accuse, to whom do I deny?  Grrrr, I have to admit it, it’s me!

It’s hard for me to admit to these, and even harder to admit I'm missing my Newmanettes. 

Everyone keeps asking me how I’m doing now that we’re Premature Empty Nesters, and I keep telling them, "I'm fine, I'm too busy to notice".  Am I one of those parents feeling a bit lost? NOT ME!  I  finally sat quietly for a few minutes back to back, and it didn’t take long for me to miss them like crazy!  I texted my sister of another mother and told her I needed a drink.  She immediately called and said, “I don’t want you to drink alone, so I’m having a drink with you” and we leaned on one another and our losses for a little while.  She is also an empty nester, and she is very much grieving the recent death of her beloved Professor Hottie, so she understands how I am very much grieving my Joshie, and the bittersweet joy of watching my girls on their life adventures!  After a little while, I felt much better!

My sisters of other mothers

The one thing I am learning in this journey, is life isn't for wussies, and I am so thankful  I have been given wonderful people in my life.  Even though I am obviously prideful, there is one thing I don’t mind denying. ...

Who is walking alone in life's journey?  NOT ME!

Yes, I have acknowledged some bad habits, but I don’t want to take away Brad’s reason for living, so I’m sure I will continue to  leave lights on, doors open, oven turned on, put ice cream in the fridge…shhhhh, sometimes I do it on purpose.     


 

Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.  ~ Marcus Tullius Cicero

HUGS,

Sherri

Light in their Eyes!

The house is so quiet.  The girls are at college, Brad is travelling for work;   His travel happened to be near Britt, and coincidentally?!  It was the weekend of the Tennessee/Oklahoma game at Oklahoma!

Let the trash talking begin! They were pretty civilized about it.  It didn't seem fair to me since I've been forced to relive U of Akron's defeat to Tennessee THIRTY YEARS AGO.  I just roll my eyes and tell him to Let it go already!!!   

His plan for this game was pretty diplomatic.  Support his beloved Vols while also being the supportive Dad…his chosen outfit?  Red OU shorts and a orange UT shirt.  BLAGHHHHH!  I cringe when I think of that combo.  I asked him to consider a white shirt with orange T on it, but he would hear nothing about it.

Game on!  I was sitting with friends christening a friend’s new patio/fire pit on a crisp and cool fall night, when the photos began to come my way.

I love this photo!  My first thought was, look how beautiful my oldest child has become.

 

Then the unexpected happened? I started getting photos from Stephi who was checking out the local sights around Wilmington.  She included this photo, and I thought, Oh my goodness, look how beautiful my second child has become.

 

 

They are both growing up, and it is my joy to watch them make their way.  They also have been working through their grief, and I love that there is a light in their eyes.  They both miss Josh so much, and there are some heartbreaking phone calls, but moments captured like these give me such Joy!

Oh by the way, Oklahoma whipped Tennessee’s butt…

The game of life is a lot like football.  You have to tackle your problems, block your fears, and score your points when you get the opportunity.  ~ Lewis Grizzard

HUGS!

Sherri

 

Oblivious to the obvious-off to college

It's here, another major milestone!  Brittany is off to college.  I am still in denial and may stay there until ....hmmmm December sounds good...then she'll be home on break.

Brad, always the practical engineer,  has been trying to prepare me for this huge change.  He always forgets I have the gift of being oblivious to the obvious.   I think I like that gift right now.  He is already grieving the loss of having Britt at home to aggravate and love on a daily basis.  I don't feel it yet...I can only focus on today and she's here.

Maybe it's more real for him because he took her to the college visitations "way out there" and watched her face light up once she saw the campus.   He knows her heart is already in Oklahoma.  It will be Brad taking her on the big road trip from Virginia to Oklahoma with stops in Tennessee to visit family.  We will pray hard for Brittany as we know how much Brad loves to travel through busy unfamiliar cities, and how he likes to "passionately critique" other drivers who perhaps aren't focused on driving while behind the wheel.

You would never know this man has travelled all over the world during his career.  He has been fretting about everything.....will everything fit in the car?  Is she packed? Is she ready?  I assure him everything will be fine.  In about a week I won't be so sure.

 Britt is fretting as to whether 10 pairs of shoes and 2 suitcases of clothing are too much.  I remind her, that this is her life...this is not summer camp.   Take it all and see what fits! 

Brad is so focused on Britt that he has filled the car with college stuff and left his beloved golf clubs at home alone without a sitter.  When Britt asked him if he was taking his clubs on this trip with her, and he answered "No, it's all about you!"  I think she was shocked...and touched.  No greater love is there than a parent for their child.

I find it both touching and amusing that Brad is worried for ME when "It" hits the fan.  All those  times he was pacing back and forth that he did over the years as I slept soundly, or read to pass the time, and he is worried about me?!   ...I know he has a valid concern.  Both my Alpha and Omega children will both be away from me.  Let's not think about it. 

Let's think about what this means to Stephi.  I can see it now....Stephi will be so tired of being the center of our attention, that she will run wildly out of the door screaming for space and her independence when it comes her time to leave in two years. 

I'm  now turning to distraction by suggesting to Brittany that she map out the road trip she and her dad will take and stop for some great photo ops such as "Largest ball of yarn; World's largest skillet" or something fun.  It looks like Graceland in Memphis might fit the bill.  I'm sure Brad will love the jungle room.

As my mind wanders, all I can think about is I hope she has as great a college experience as I did.   I loved college and the people who became my life.  I reminded her that she needs to find her "Marcia and Gloria"...former college 'partners in crime' aka roomies who have become sisters of a different mother.   

Oh, and Britt if you're reading this, I really don't need to hear those amazing stories of what made those college friendships great until years from now. My heart is fragile :)

Yep, I'm handling it really well.

~ I have told her I have plans for her room. She just rolls her eyes.

~ I remind her that I won't even notice she's gone. She laughs until she cackles.

~ I have told her I will get my needed daily hugs from other sources...strangers if I have to. She nods in agreement to that one. Hmmmm.

~ I have told her I'm thrilled my house will remain clean.  She reminds me she was the neat child.

I have used great quotes from well respected sources such as the movie "Bull Durham" to get her prepared.  "Brittany, college classes are gonna light you up like a pinball game for a little while; Don't worry about it".  She looks relieved.  Really?  I quote a baseball movie and she gets it!

 I'm not really in denial.  I know I'll miss her and grieve her madly, but right now all I can be is excited for her! How wonderful is this first taste of independence?  She gets to make her own dreams come true and enjoy the moment!  Her "workday" is a day of constant learning, reading, and socializing with people her age.  Her whole world is within walking distance and she will plan her life out a week at a time. No greater time is there than these.

Of course it comes up....that big elephant in the room.  How will she do on her own across country when those pangs for her baby brother hit full force?   I honestly don't know....we are venturing into uncharted territory.  But one thing is certain... I am only 1 exit away from the airport and I will cash in my 401k if that's what I need to do to get to her in a time of need. 

She is my oldest child, my light, my world and now it's time for me to let her grow her earthly wings.  I just won't let her see the tears that fall as we leave her on her own.    I have to keep remembering that she is God's child and there are things he needs her to do so I will do my best to cut the apron strings and let her do her thing.

It all comes down to this great quote by Eleanor Powell.....
  "What we are is God's gift to us. What we become is our gift to God." ~Eleanor Powell

Sending Hugs to my Beautiful Brittany! 

Hugs,
Sherri