Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts

Sunday, July 21, 2013

The Dance

My college roommate's daughter, is now a married woman!  Wow!  The first wedding where I’m old enough to be the mother of the bride…. yikes....well....maybe a year too young since Gloria is a WHOLE YEAR older than me.


Sam and the Newmanettes on a roadtrip..notice how excited Josh is 
 
I’ve been a part of Sammy's life since before she was born.  In fact, I’m part of the reason she was born.  I introduced her parents when we were all in college, and the rest is history. 
Over the years there have been many adventures with Samantha including stints as our "summer nanny" before she went to college.  It wasn’t too much later after she started college that I started to hear about a guy….hmmmm! 
 
It took a while, but when I finally met Zach there was little doubt he was THE ONE, so it was no surprise when the magical proposal beneath Cinderella’s Castle appeared on my facebook page and I was on my way to Ohio for a July 6th wedding. 
 
Samantha and Zach were married on the college campus where they met in a quaint white-washed chapel with all of us looking on.  I had the direct view of Sammy’s face during her vows and I just melted over how beautiful she was in that moment.


Zach and Samantha

The wedding  reception following the service included a “Longest Married” dance.  When the music started, Brad grabbed my hand and we were off.  I eyed the competition.....  I felt pretty confident we could take on Sam and Zach since they had been married about 60 minutes, but some of the others looked like they might have a little more of an edge…it looked like a nail biter.

Brad and I turned and turned as they went down the list….. “5 years, 10 years, 15 years”  at 20 years we started to sweat since the floor hadn’t really cleared out much.  I mean c’mon, we are very proud that we have managed to stay married for almost 22 years and in many circles that is quite an accomplishment, but not with this seasoned bunch.
Soon however, we were wallflowers on the sidelines as they hit 30 years, 40 years, 50…..  At 50 years there were still 4 couples twirling around.  They really were twirling too..no walkers, or canes to be found.  At 56 years there were 2, but ultimately, at 59 years there was only one couple left standing;  The wonderful parents of the special man in mother of the bride’s life.  We will call him Professor Hottie.

I have had the honor of spending some time with Professor Hottie’s parents in the last couple of years, and I am quite taken with their spirit.  They are the proud parents of six, who upon learning about Joshua's death, reached out to me and shared the story of how they held their 3 year old daughter in their arms as she took her last breath 50 years ago.  Their story came at the exact moment when I needed hope, and I am still so grateful they shared their story with me. 

Samantha and Brittany.  Height has its advantage when trying to catch the bouquet.
 
So, tonight watching them dance arm and arm smiling at one another, I got all warm and fuzzy.  I was reminded once again how lucky I am  to have a special someone who wants to share this dance with me.  While there is no doubt that either of us would have chosen the path our dance has taken in recent years with the death of our youngest child, we are both so thankful to those who have travelled through the twists and turns before us and offer their support.  Through their example of enduring love, we are learning to keep on dancing no matter what what life brings.  
Oh yea, there was another bright moment of hope in the evening when Britt caught the bouquet.  Could this be a peek into my future?  Britt, if you are reading this, THERE IS NO HURRY!
 
Sending my love to Zach and Samantha!
Hugs,

Sherri

Friday, November 18, 2011

Anniversary Chocolates

November 16th was my 20th wedding anniversary with my mountain man from Tennessee.  I should be thrilled right?  I have to admit I don't know what to think about my anniversary anymore.  It was always a very happy day for me...the day someone committed his heart to my care and mine to his. 

Just like many other happy couples, we have had some differences even when we thought we were on the same page.  For example when our daughter  made her debut we knew exactly what we would call her, the interesting part was when it came time to spell her name.....I spelled B-r-i-t-t-a-n-y, while Brad spelled B-r-i-t-n-e-y.  Hmmmm, ooops!   After much discussion, Brittany Leigh Newman was ready to face the world.  She was joined two years later by Stephanie Nicole and  2 years later by baby brother Joshua.  Our family was complete by our 7th anniversary.

Fast forward a few years and we were celebrating Anniversary 19 with our family of five at a fastfood place to contribute to a fundraiser for our high school. We celebrated in style sitting in a pleather seated booth and  I remember looking over at the kids laughing and realizing life was good.... Little did I know it would be our last family meal together.

Joshua passed away from a epilepsy condition known as SUDEP 4 days later on Saturday, November 20th and our marriage and everything about our family changed forever.   We were so brokenhearted that 12 months later as we faced our monumental 20th anniversary,  we didn't know what to do. How could we celebrate the happiness of 20 years of marriage when our family is no longer together? 

We tried to make the most of it, special dinner, time together with the girls, and as I got into bed I found a wrapped box of chocolates with a beautiful card.  My reaction?  I started laughing....now understandably Brad was a bit put off by my reaction until I told him to check his side of the bed.....there beneath his pillows was a wrapped box of chocolates with a beautiful card.  Without each other's knowledge we had gone to the same place to purchase the same unique chocolates as a token of love even in this difficult time.   This was truly a moment of laughter through tears!

One thing that they say to try when you lose a child is to change traditions....we have thought about this realizing that our anniversary really is a difficult day to celebrate, so for a little while I think maybe we'll celebrate the day Brad proposed to me instead...January 2nd.  I believe in time I will realize not only how special that night was 1 year ago on November 16th, but how lucky I am to be loved by my husband and my children here and above.

Hugs,
Sherri