I have been so naive. I am by my very nature, an optimist, and while my ability to remember names is a gift, I'm thankful my memory forgets to hold grudges or stay angry longer than 2 minutes.
As I am 1/2 way through my 5th decade, I have experienced so many things, natural disasters, the murder of my friends and years later my Papau, and most recently the shattering of my heart when my son Joshua died from SUDEP.
Until Joshua died, when people would ask me how I was doing I would always say "just another day in paradise" and mean it. I loved me life. Not that my life was peaceful, afterall, I am the married working mother of three. Any of those descriptions alone can mean crazy life but together they are insanity. Yet, somehow it fits me!
I am a changed woman in some ways for the better....I once had the ability to look at hardships and glean over them just like so many other people. I used to see the news as it showed highlights of the day. Murder, robbery, pain pain pain and I would think "oh those poor people" and move on to the next thing. Now that I am a statistic and have joined a club I have no desire to be a member of, bereaved parent, my eyes have been blown wide open.
This weekend the news covered the raging antics of a single person who murdered 78 people, mostly young people, to make a personal point. In the old days I would have talked about it with friends "around the water cooler" and we all would have shook our heads in disbelief for a few days...genuinely so, but my level of involvement would have been submarginal at best. Fast forward to life now and I am plain heartbroken because I know that for each person who was murdered, there is at least one person and likely many more whose world is crashing around them and they feel like they can't breathe. At the same time, thousands of good people, including those who walk in their faith are stepping up to comfort, and help those whose loss is so great.
Once you lose someone so close it's amazing how tuned in you become to the world around you even as your body is tuning out of your day to day. You see so much more of the picture while nursing your broken heart.
My hope is for the great stories of love that will eventually come out of this disaster. I personally feel that something good has to come from the loss of each and every life....there will be a great light that will shine brighter because they were part of us and impacted our lives in ways we can't even imagine.
Even as my heart is breaking I am praying to God for hope and comfort for the newest members of a club noone chooses to join...that of a bereaved parent.
May God cradle them into his loving arms and hold them at this time when they are too weary to hold themselves up.
Hugs,
Sherri
As I am 1/2 way through my 5th decade, I have experienced so many things, natural disasters, the murder of my friends and years later my Papau, and most recently the shattering of my heart when my son Joshua died from SUDEP.
Until Joshua died, when people would ask me how I was doing I would always say "just another day in paradise" and mean it. I loved me life. Not that my life was peaceful, afterall, I am the married working mother of three. Any of those descriptions alone can mean crazy life but together they are insanity. Yet, somehow it fits me!
I am a changed woman in some ways for the better....I once had the ability to look at hardships and glean over them just like so many other people. I used to see the news as it showed highlights of the day. Murder, robbery, pain pain pain and I would think "oh those poor people" and move on to the next thing. Now that I am a statistic and have joined a club I have no desire to be a member of, bereaved parent, my eyes have been blown wide open.
This weekend the news covered the raging antics of a single person who murdered 78 people, mostly young people, to make a personal point. In the old days I would have talked about it with friends "around the water cooler" and we all would have shook our heads in disbelief for a few days...genuinely so, but my level of involvement would have been submarginal at best. Fast forward to life now and I am plain heartbroken because I know that for each person who was murdered, there is at least one person and likely many more whose world is crashing around them and they feel like they can't breathe. At the same time, thousands of good people, including those who walk in their faith are stepping up to comfort, and help those whose loss is so great.
Once you lose someone so close it's amazing how tuned in you become to the world around you even as your body is tuning out of your day to day. You see so much more of the picture while nursing your broken heart.
My hope is for the great stories of love that will eventually come out of this disaster. I personally feel that something good has to come from the loss of each and every life....there will be a great light that will shine brighter because they were part of us and impacted our lives in ways we can't even imagine.
Even as my heart is breaking I am praying to God for hope and comfort for the newest members of a club noone chooses to join...that of a bereaved parent.
May God cradle them into his loving arms and hold them at this time when they are too weary to hold themselves up.
Hugs,
Sherri
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