I came home from work this week to find Brad down right
pissed off! I was hoping it wasn’t aimed
at me, when he pointed towards a letter on the counter.
One of the things I listed in an earlier blog, http://thenewmans.blogspot.com/2012/04/sudep-what-i-wish-i-had-done.html "What I wish I had done differently" , alluded to the challenges of communication and disorganization with the doctor’s office. We were only with this doctor for four months when Josh died. During that time we struggled with busy phones, scheduling challenges, etc. which had led us to make some decisions I regret. We knew this doctor’s reputation was great and we had great hope, but we were also looking around for other options.
Fast forward 4 years and we receive this letter. I mean, seriously, how hard is it to update records? Sweet Ornery Boy Deceased!
We received the announcement of your practice change this week. You can imagine our surprise since our son Joshua, died from seizure in 2010.
I know he will always be in your heart, as you shared with us in the early weeks following his death, but we need his records to be updated and ensure we don't receive any future notifications like this. It's just too hard.
In his response he apologized, blaming the error on the new group's administrators and he would try to make sure, this never happens again.
It didn't give me great comfort nor did I feel confident that it wouldn't happen again. It just reminded me once again, that no matter how much time goes on, my family's pain lies just beneath the surface and can show itself in full force in a second. We need to prepare ourselves as much as we can.
I can't believe I did this, but I posted the incident on
Facebook. The response was swift,
including offers to kick the doctor in the shins, offers to call his office (so sweet) to
make them aware and get the issue
fixed. I so appreciated the love and
support which helped me rediscover my grace, and helped me start to "get over it".
HUGS!
Sherri
It didn’t take long to figure out the source of his anger....There was a letter addressed to Joshua Newman
from his former Neurologist announcing the doctor’s move to another practice.
The gist of the letter stated that if you wished to continue seeing him, his
new contact information was included.
Heart stab with salt crusted knife!!!!! My body went numb!
All that hard work was gone in an instant! Just when I was getting to that point in healing where I was
starting to forgive myself for the “What
Ifs,” the things I wish I had done
differently ( in my mind) that could have saved Josh, this stupid letter arrives.One of the things I listed in an earlier blog, http://thenewmans.blogspot.com/2012/04/sudep-what-i-wish-i-had-done.html "What I wish I had done differently" , alluded to the challenges of communication and disorganization with the doctor’s office. We were only with this doctor for four months when Josh died. During that time we struggled with busy phones, scheduling challenges, etc. which had led us to make some decisions I regret. We knew this doctor’s reputation was great and we had great hope, but we were also looking around for other options.
Fast forward 4 years and we receive this letter. I mean, seriously, how hard is it to update records? Sweet Ornery Boy Deceased!
How do you respond to such a thing? I've learned my first thoughts are never the way to go, so I slept on it, and then responded.
Dear Dr. We received the announcement of your practice change this week. You can imagine our surprise since our son Joshua, died from seizure in 2010.
It was really hard to receive this announcement as it meant our son's records were not updated to show his death in your office.
I know he will always be in your heart, as you shared with us in the early weeks following his death, but we need his records to be updated and ensure we don't receive any future notifications like this. It's just too hard.
We have walked the National Walk for Epilepsy every year since 2011....you should come. It's an amazing event and advocate for seizure awareness.
Best of luck with your new practice.
Regards,
It didn't give me great comfort nor did I feel confident that it wouldn't happen again. It just reminded me once again, that no matter how much time goes on, my family's pain lies just beneath the surface and can show itself in full force in a second. We need to prepare ourselves as much as we can.
Four days later I was commissioned as a Congregational Care Minister to take care of those who need love and support during times of trial. My emphasis will be holding the hands of the grieving.
Surrounded by friends, my name was called, and I knelled before the Minister and
was anointed in Christ to serve others. It felt like I had come full circle emotionally in a matter of days.
It’s not a plan I would have chosen for myself, to be the mother of any angel, and I am
obviously forever broken and vulnerable, but God’s grace and Love was once again revealed and assures me that He will carry me even
during tough moments.Surrounded by friends, my name was called, and I knelled before the Minister and
was anointed in Christ to serve others. It felt like I had come full circle emotionally in a matter of days.
What gives me the most hope every day is God's grace;
knowing that his grace is going to give me the strength for whatever I face,
knowing that nothing is a surprise to God.
Rick Warren
Those kinds of letters can be such kicks in the gut. My son's college reunion was one of the same for us. I am glad you are finding hope in Christ, and in serving others. Pain certainly builds bridges. That is one of the better lessons from grief. God bless you.
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