Making friends is tough!

Stephi came home for the long weekend.  I had no idea she was coming home so it was extra nice!

I was laying across her bed catching up as she unpacked and peppering her with the usual questions

• How are classes going? Great, except Math…..I need to learn to translate Chinglish.
• Are you discovering places around college? No mom.  I prefer hanging with my roomie or the quiet of my room.
• What do you do for fun?  Not much. Video games, Netflix binging Gilmore Girls and Ally McBeal.  Sometimes I walk the beach alone.

This stops me in my tracks and my brain is screaming   Noooooo!  Not that I don't appreciate binge watching Gilmore Girls or Ally McBeal.

A day at the beach. Stephi & Josh

After prodding a bit more it came out.  She doesn’t like to make new friends because she doesn’t want to tell them that her brother is dead.

Hands to the sky.  Whhhhhyyyyyy Myyyy Chilllldddd?

My next thought was maybe this would be a good time to become a helicopter parent and make her life easier.

The Newmanettes

Of course, who am I kiddin'?  I haven’t exactly been a great model myself.  I admit I’ve avoided situations that mean I have to answer the "How many kids do you have?" question. 
There was that time during my annual scrapbooking retreat a couple of years ago, where I went into town for dinner with some of the ladies and suddenly realized there was an empty seat next to me.  My heart raced, my hands sweated as I thought about the possibility of someone sitting there and innocently asking me about my children.  Since then, I’ve opted for pizza delivery with friends who were at my side in 2010.

And I should expect better from a shy teenage girl?   This is so unfair!  She was so young and has seen so much ugly already.  She did nothing to deserve this!

I have no doubt God will use her to do amazing things down the road of her life, but right now she’s in the slow cooking character forming part of life, and it’s so hard to watch.

Britt & Friends at Texas State Fair

Dear God… it’s one thing to put me through this horrible experience, but why must my children go through it during a time that's supposed to be so much fun?

I do find hope when I look at Brittany’s early college days.   Her early days were eerily parallel to Stephi’s until God sent some special people to her life who had similar experiences to her own.  She now has a core group of great friends who know the boy in the photos, and the sadness she struggles with every November.  The core group shows up in her Facebook photos at football games, Texas State Fair, birthday parties, and even bison watching.

Road trip to see Britt = Phil Vassar concert in a field

I’m prayin’ hard for Stephi!  I trust her with my whole heart, and I know I am not a helicopter mom, but I think this calls for a roadtrip  to North Carolina,  “Gilmore Girls style" a little crazy, totally spontaneous, and with lots of laughter! 

Where You Lead by Carole King (Gilmore Girls Theme)

Where You Lead,  I will followIf you're out on the road
Feelin' lonely and so cold
All you have to do is call my name
And I'll be there!

Hugs!  Sherri